A lifetime lived in one year

My sweet Josh, How has it already been one year without you? It doesn't feel like it could possibly have been a year but at the same time, it feels like lifetimes ago since I held you and breathed in your sweet aroma and kissed your feathery soft hair. Every day I walk into your … Continue reading A lifetime lived in one year

Living life with open hands.

Surreal. Synonyms of surreal include unreal, bizarre, unusual, weird, strange, freakish, unearthly, uncanny, dreamlike. Have you ever looked back on your life or parts of your life and just felt like it was surreal? I've felt that a lot in my life, not only with the crazy circumstances of my brother's death but now, as I watched the news story of my son. I often think, … Continue reading Living life with open hands.

To the parents without a happy ending.

Before my son was born and throughout his short life, I would often search for inspiring stories of people with only one arm who conquered a sport or children with visual impairment who still made their dreams come true. I wanted my son to be the inspirational NICU story, who beat all the odds, and … Continue reading To the parents without a happy ending.

First Christmas in Heaven

Oh how badly I wish this was your first Christmas with us, instead of your first Christmas in heaven. Although I can imagine the worship in heaven can't even compare to ours down here. Spending Christmas with Christ himself would be better than anything I could give you wrapped under the tree, but how my … Continue reading First Christmas in Heaven

The night my heart went to heaven.

I've debated sharing this part of Joshua's story. The darkest part. However, my desire is that maybe it can give someone hope that through the unthinkable, they can and will make it through. A few years ago I volunteered for Camp Erin. It's a bereavement camp for children. I had always had a heart for … Continue reading The night my heart went to heaven.