Five years ago today, I woke up to find your warm body, still. After waking up suddenly, lurching out of bed, I still believe it was my soul sensing yours had left. I still wish you were here. Your gap in our lives is blaring to me every time I count your siblings to make … Continue reading Five years in paradise
As soon as the air starts turning warm and the first signs of spring start emerging, I feel it in my bones. Before my mind even catches on to what's happening, my body remembers. I start feeling anxious, nostalgic, sad because with the arrival of spring comes the cascade of memories. The odd thing is, … Continue reading The Dichotomy of Spring: Grief and Hope
Since losing the majority of my unwanted pounds, I've maintained my weight fairly well. I have noticed that every holiday/winter season I tend to gain about five pounds, which is fine. We should all be aiming to maintain within a range anyway. Well recently, after having gained the holiday weight as well as another five … Continue reading More protein, more steps, more pounds, oh my!
I don't know about you, but a nagging question that has followed me from the teenage years until now has been "What's my purpose? Why am I here? What is God's will for my life?" Many people in the Christian faith might even say, "What is your calling?" Our culture and even Christian culture has … Continue reading What if this IS my calling?
It's a snowy day, this first day of 2022. We've hardly received any snow this fall/winter season, so it has been a welcome respite from the dryness. It continues to fall gently outside my window, and my children have already been sledding twice this morning. As I've sat by the fire and welcomed in a … Continue reading Living with Intentionality
As I said in my first post, I have a roller coaster relationship with food and weight. I've never been extremely overweight or underweight but I wanted to find a weight I felt my best at, while also finding that mystery of moderation with food and especially my weakness of desserts. After I had my … Continue reading Losing 45 pounds (part 2)
I'd say it started in middle school, "it" being my super self-consciousness of my body and its shape and size. I had super long and lean legs, but my short torso tended to scrunch everything together, making me very aware that my stomach was not as long and lean as my peers' tended to be, … Continue reading Body Image, Food, and Fitness (part 1)
As many of you know, I've struggled with an anxiety disorder most of my life. However, I've never wanted fear to hold me back from having experiences or from living life to the fullest. I would frequently challenge myself and push myself out of my comfort zone. For example, I'm scared of heights and my … Continue reading Reckless or Fearless?
We both excitedly told our families we were expecting another. We both gazed in amazement at that black and white ultrasound. The sound of our babies' heartbeat made us awe at the miracle growing inside. We both endured morning sickness and heartburn and insomnia. We both felt the kicks and squirms as well as the … Continue reading The same yet different paths
My son lived for 81 days, and for each of those 79 days, I traveled anywhere from 40min to an hour and a half, each way, to see him in the NICU/PICU. There were no off-days on weekends or holidays. Rain or shine, heavy traffic or light traffic, babysitter or none, sick kids at home … Continue reading Practicing Perseverance in a Pandemic